YNGASCTMAGFI!

Have you ever tried to sell anything? I’m not talking about you career sales people, my heroes. I’m talking about a used car, garage sale stuff, the bike your kid out-grew, the chrome toaster you don’t use any more. That stuff. Now, think of when it was new. Take a car, as an easy example. We have all bought and sold a car at least one time in our life…or think of selling a house….we’ve all done that, too. Nerve wracking, wasn’t it? It never went the way you wanted it to…it took longer, the price dropped a few times, we had a few “interested” buyers that it turned out were just kicking the tires or the downspout. Or maybe the phone never rang………..

Or were there were the clods that just seemed to be out to give you a bad day…they got under you skin….they got your knickers in a twist over something & they did it good! GRRR!

Look, when that car was new, the manufacturer had something called a “marketing budget”. They knew they had to get the word out that they had this sexy, new model. It took years to develop and they needed to sell a bunch of them just to break even. They needed to create a “demand”. Now, just how the heck does a car company create a “want”, for a car that’s not even out yet, or in the local showroom? Simple! They take pitchers of it and plaster those pitchers where interested viewers just might see it.

They thought about it, hired some “car shooter” to take it out, along with a crew of assistants, and lo & behold, the company has a whole bunch of angles, picked by the “car shooter”, showing every shiny, smooth surface, sexy curves, slender, long lines, nice headlights, cute rear end, etc. The car company takes out ads, shows the glittering, shiny, clean car, in the perfect, dreamy setting and whaddayaknow! They have created more demand than supply! Soon, buyers are lining up at dealers, putting down cash deposits on a car they haven’t seen or driven…but they sure WANT ONE! Why? Have you ever heard or creating DESIRE?

OK, how did they do it? What’s the magic? How can they manipulate innocent viewers into a state of “gottahavit!!”?

Here’s the $64K ?, Answer…..they used the old premise of…… “You Never Get a Second Chance To Make a Great First Impression”. They ATTRACTED buyers, because they WANTED it. Once that car got out on the street, it looked like every other car. But First, They turned on the viewer. They put that squeaky-clean, all shined up, mirror-smooth car in the minds of a prospective buyer. They made that buyer imagine they HAD that car already, even though it was just a photo.

(here’s a professional secret….shhhhhh!) [he says, whispering] They made the photos of the car better and different than the real car. They picked the best angle and put the lighting where the belt-line would accentuate the 3D shape of the car. It made it look longer, better, more agile, attractive than the beater you have sitting in the driveway, now. Look behind the car in the photo….that’s NOT YOUR DRIVEWAY!!!

Have you ever tried to sell anything?

A close businesswoman/friend of mine, was telling me she had signed up for Match Dot COM, (’cause she’s single and full of life, but was without a spouse/soul mate) and was telling me about the unbelievable listings and photos of the guys that were coming to her in her email. She ROARED, laughing at the “bozos and lumberjacks” and the stupid, insipid outfits the guys were wearing. She actually opened up her email and showed me. O-M-G! I had NO IDEA! Then, she told me about her friend (woman) who had posted photos of herself on her MATCH Dot COM site…..and the radio silence that followed….not a single hit, other than morons who you would not get caught dead with. She said I had to see for my self. I resisted, see, because I’m not just married, I’m HAPPILY married to the love of my life! What the heck would I be doing on MATCH Dot COM? The LOML would be VERY disappointed in me….and frankly, a married guy has NO right to be on a dating site.

But I’m not goin’ dere.

Two or so, weeks went buy and I saw this businesswoman/friend again and she asked me if I’d signed up yet. I shook my head no. She laid into me. “What The Heck?…I’m trying to show you something and you won’t even look!” Shamed and (you know what), I went back to my confuser and logged on to the MATCH…..you know. I answered all the boiler plate questions and at step 11 of 12, I chickened out. BOK BOK BOK! BOK-BOK! I just could not do it…no WAY! So I left it alone, or signed out or something, but I just could not sign up saying… “Hi, I’m 5’11’, non-smoker, have kids, but they don’t live with me all the time…. UM, I’m here to see what you ladies look like”. It’s like, SO ICKY! (I even made up my own screen name, which I kinda like. I never posted any photos or clicked on “Sign up here, lurker”.

Two days later, I got an email from MATCH Dot COM…I thought it was some form-email saying, ” Hey you stupid moron, you forgot step 12…we have matches WAITING for you!!!”

Nope, it wasn’t that. I had 12 “MATCHES” in my in-box! WHAT???? EWWW!

I wan’t prepared. I ducked under the desktop! SHOOT, I thought. What Happened??? Oh NOOO! I’ma gonna get kilt!

Then I read all the fine print above the photos and the site was apologizing, for not finding any “exact matches, because I failed to do step 12, but here are the best we can come up with, from the profile I submitted….please fill out the rest of your form and hit the submit button below.”

OH Jumpin’ Gehosephat! I was invisible to others, but I was getting 12 fresh “possible matches” every day. I was lurking and being absolutely gutless about it! How did THAT happen?

So I started looking at the daily dozen fresh maidens, picked by some remote confuser, just for my lip smacking enjoyment! Fresh meat every day! I sorta liked this zoo I was caged in. ‘Cept the meat was…..um….SPOIL’T! (sound of spitting inserted here)

The sound of my incredulity was deafening! Day after day, week after week, month after month, I keep getting the most gawd-awful, fuzzy, dark, wacko angled, weirdly cropped out -ex, goofy eyes, ugly clothes, mostly captured by the light of the laptop screen and uploaded via the “webcam”.

It makes me want to cry! Here, all of these women coming into my email, pouring their hearts out, their desires, their wishes, their dreams (and why the hell do they all want to go for long walks on the beach?), yet the ONE THING, the DEAL BREAKER, the YOU NEVER GET A SECOND CHANCE TO MAKE A GOOD FIRST IMPRESSION, is the one thing Guar-Ron-TEED thing that is REPELLING, not ATTRACTING a “match”? Their PHOTO!

PEE-YOU!

Is this all the more these women value them selves? (I ask myself?) No wonder they don’t get any hits. They keep showing up, randomly in my in-box, months on end.

Haven’t you ever sold anything before? If I were selling my car, it would be clean, inside and out, all the dents and rust fixed, it would smell nice. Even though it has miles on it. WHY? Because YOU NEVER GET A SECOND CHANCE TO MAKE A GOOD FIRST IMPRESSION!

If I want to get what I’m asking, for the car, I make it LOOK as good as possible…that’s how it was sold as new. Dealerships go out of their way to keep the cars on the lot, clean and shiny. Why? YNGASCTMAGFI!

So, If Y-O-U are the PRODUCT you are trying to SELL, do your homework, put on the clothes your “match” wants to see you wearing and spend some time and money for a real photographer who will create desire in the buyers eye.

If you don’t, expect the worst and you ‘ll never be disappointed.

Respect yourself!

Put yourself in the best possible position.

Collect more leads in one day than you have in months!

What ever you are trying to sell, make it better than the other 11 on the page.

Show the world…….Beautiful YOU!

 

©2011 JohnRobertWilliams

Leave a Reply